never one to disappoint

[Don't read this, just skip this whole part]

you were never one for instructions, never wanted to be told what to do, never wanted to feel confined by people telling you what to do. you were old enough to decide for yourself. you (fooled yourself into thinking that you) tried your best on your own. and yes, yes you did.

you were never one for criticism. they were attacking you. you were just a kid. and you're amazing already. you're already good enough, they just can't see it in you. to the hell with those people, you hung around only the people who lavished you with compliments, who saw what you saw in yourself, and said so (all the things you wanted to hear, all the things you wanted to know were true).

then everything went wrong. when you found out that, to your horror, (even though you knew it inside for such a while) that you couldn't write, couldn't act, couldn't speak, couldn't do anything well. you screamed at yourself, telling yourself you needed to do things better. so you tried, this time reallyreallyreally, as hard as you could.

(too little, too late, as they say.)

and they're...they're...right.

[there. aren't you glad you didn't read that? yes, yes you are.]

I'm not happy today. Poof. I haven't gotten much work done, no fanfiction went anywhere, and I'm hopelessly disgruntled at my lousy writing. Moping time starts now.







ends now.

On the CNY front, I'm happy with the money I got. xD

I guess I'll close now.